Planet's Funniest Animals

So, my homework this week for improv class (it's level 4 -- don't fuck with me. I'm either a complete sucker or I'm highly advanced) is to watch some animal television. I think the ideal would be some old school lions-devouring-gazelles drama. But I tuned into Animal Planet, and what I get is a show called "Planet's Funniest Animals." I pity the planet. Because if these are the funniest animals we've got, then god bless global warming. It's like America's Funniest Home Videos but without the dignity or the humor. I just watched a cat fall off something. And a dog jump *underneath* a trampoline. At one point (1986?) that dog would've gotten a sitcom deal, but audiences have gotten a little more sophisticated since then. We require some shitting and/or pissing from our animal comics to be satisfied.

Ugh. The host just signed off with a reminder to "wind your watch....dogs!" Who the fuck winds a watch anymore, dogs?

Coming soon: batshit lovely beijing traveller's guide. Here's the cover: